# Introduction The time is 3:54 AM, 27 August 2021 Place is the balcony, cold wind, almost perfect silent but distant sounds of insects. Tomorrow I'll be having a webinar about creating and maintaining startup. To be honest I was quite surprised that such university that I barely have a connection of would invite me to have a talk, especially about one of the things that I love the most, which is startups. If I were to put it in simple words why I love it so much, is because I believe is what makes the world a better place. It solves problems. This article is not specifically about startup however. I'm surprised that when I share it for the first time to my main instagram that a lot of people were congratulating me and saying nice things, even the ones that I barely talked with this year. I am currently facing a lot of difficulties. I think, mostly mentally, it's rather hard to explain. But somehow talking to people about without really technically solving the problems often lifts the burden away. I don't really know if it make sense but a friend of mine once said that some people is not meant to carry other people burden. I don't know how this article would end up as this one is entirely different from the articles that I used to write that I usually think about the context, prolog, conclusion, etc. This time, I just felt like something is wrong and I need to type it out, I need to get it out of my chest without taking other people time to talk about something that I'm not entirely sure about the solution of. Let's start the rant. # Rant What is up with people nowadays trying as much as they could to maintain the status quo that they work the hardest? This may be just my opinion but sometimes I feel like the same people keep constantly creating content of pure humble bragging. Pure fucking humble bragging with zero value. It boils my blood to the point that I even wrote in this article. Why am I so stressed all the time? Why do I feel overwhelmed, Why can't I feel relaxed? Why do I want to do everything at the same time? Why do I feel like I'm a totally different person occasionally? Why can't I make things right? Why do I keep repeating the same mistake? Why am I always complaining? Why am I so annoyed with almost everything? # Problem There's a lot of things that I want to do and it seems that there's so little time to put up with the best possible scenario for happening. I lack virtue to see what's the best for me I am not sure whether I'm being selfish # Reflect "What matters is not the begginning or the middle, what matters is the end." As long as I'm still able to stand, as long as I still have fingers, as long as I can still see, I will make my effort matters to the very best, until everything feels numb. # Unspeakable Regret I have failed a lot of people. I failed people that looked up to me. I failed people who had expectations towards me. I did not became the person that my younger self wishes myself to be. I feel sorry for the people who had put their faith in me for I did not come remotely near to their expectations. # Reflect There's still time to make things right, even though it's undeniably imperfect. It doesn't matter if its undeniably imperfect, what matters are that you realized the imperfection. You cannot tell the difference between perfection and imperfection without noticing some flaws along the way and flaws are as natural as it may come. There's still time to make things right, you have begun and you're on its way, and as far as today, you have not given up. You don't even come closse to given up. You can make things better if you put more time and heart into it. Never let down the people who count on you. Never. Lend people help and fulfill their requests. You may not finish it in one day but you can tell what have you done so far to fulfill their request. Find a way to make things right. Find a way to make things right.